The Tao of Ric: True Lies & A Fistful of Meyerisms Part 4

THE TAO OF RIC & A FISTFUL OF MEYERISMS PART 4

SHAW WARS--EPISODE IV: A NEW DOPE

"I've talked to people who have supposedly visited the Shaw's vaunted film vaults. It's a dusty, non-air conditioned cellar with virtually no shelving and rotting celluloid. So I wasn't surprised when the movies never appeared over the years. It's my theory that they don't exist. The only reason Run Run would hold onto them is if he thought he could out-live all the filmmakers, stars, and their families (and the way he's going, he very well might)." *--An apparently vengeance seeking Meyers continuously spoke ill of Shaw's legacy for years. Mere moments after the films finally surfaced in restored format on DVD and VCD in Hong Kong, Ric's tune changed from melancholic to melodic totally forgetting statements he made like the one above.

On his numerous and immensely erroneous audio commentaries, Meyers has a predilection for insulting, condescending, and, in some instances, racists remarks. At the same time, he condemns the racism in the American film industry towards Asians, but yet he is a participant himself! One of his many running jokes is his deep heated animosity towards the Shaw Brothers while professing his love for their movies all at the same time. According to Meyers, he was sent out to HK by World Northal to negotiate a sixth Black Belt Theater package. Why he couldn't negotiate a deal from America before wasting a trip to Hong Kong is anyone's guess. By his own admission, he briefly spoke with Hong Kong's biggest movie mogul on the phone where the extent of the conversation involved the word "NO". Meyers apparently tried to peddle his book on him and Shaw wasn't interested. Who could blame the HK mogul for not giving a shit, right? He obviously knew what so many still do not know today. Since that time from the mid 80s up to the early 2000s, Meyers has instigated a mudslinging campaign to paint the Shaw's in as bad a portrait as possible. Shaw should probably just go ahead and accept his book so he can go back to loving him again.


Meyers seemingly carried with him a severely bruised ego because his book was rejected by the main subject he had written about. Over the course of half a dozen or more DVD commentary tracks, he carried on this tradition by furthering his false allegations that the Shaw motion picture library had been destroyed in a fire, were being held hostage by Shaw, or had simply rotted away and dissolved. You'll notice a trend even today by which the man holds a grudge if his works aren't appreciated such as the KUNG FU PANDA 2 (2010) and FILMS OF FURY debacles which was discussed in a previous chapter.

In addition, the mythomaniacal Meyers has repeatedly made Shaw out to be this greedy, money grubbing scrooge, a stigma he still perpetuates today. Shaw did seem to have some tight-fisted ways, but not on the level of severity in which Meyers portrays him. As discussed previously, he was a businessman and his Movie Town (modeled on the old Hollywood studio system where actors and technicians were under contract), was treated much like a factory, and an extravagant one at that. Over the years the Shaw's (there are six of them, mind you) have consistently given to charity, donated money for scholarships and given care packages that include food and money to the poor every Chinese New Year among other things. That doesn't sound like a money grubbing penny pincher to me. But then, what the hell do I know? I'm not a leading authority on the genre like Ric Meyers is.

ROLLICKIN' RIC'S RUDE & RACIST REMARKS

"The Thais have not made a single one yet...They won’t. Look at the culture. I won’t say never. Never say never but it’s unlikely." *--Meyers giving advice to an interviewer to look at Thai culture as to why they are incapable of making good action movies. (craveonline.com interview; June 2011)


On other commentaries, interviews and in his books--when he isn't insulting our intelligence--Meyers even makes these somewhat racist comments towards Asian culture, which are quoted verbatim throughout this article and in the accompanying list. He states 99.9% of their movies were unscripted regardless of a credited screenwriter. Yes, I'd say it's a logical assessment that some of the cheaper movies were made up as they went along (this is done in American movies, too; scripts are changed during production, sometimes at the last minute; new additions are added daily, etc), but when you attribute the alleged lack of a script to ILLITERACY (as he does on the FISTS & GUTS commentary), you're crossing the line of good taste. Meyers also manages to insult Asian filmmakers when he makes a spiteful remark that they hadn't invented the wheel yet in regards to the use of dollies; at least not till Meyers' idol, Jackie Chan, used them in the mid 80s. The actual quote was in the previous article (part 3) at #69 on the Meyerisms list. Tracks for dollies were in use as far back as 1972 at Shaw Brothers studio--as one of the accompanying photos attests--and likely much earlier than that.


Meyers also states on this commentary track that there were no production meetings of any sort giving the impression that the Chinese filmmakers just ran off into the wild or down into a rock quarry somewhere with a camera and made a quick flick.


On the opposite end of this spectrum, in 1999, Meyers, in his ACC column, condemned an article that listed a bunch of translated Chinese titles of American movies as outright racism. Examples of this include such juicily mangled titles as GEORGE OF THE JUNGLE, which, in Asia, supposedly became BIG DUMB MONKEY MAN KEEPS WHACKING TREE WITH GENITALS and Pam Anderson's horrendous BARBED WIRE morphed into DELICATE ORBS OF WOMANHOOD BIGGER THAN YOUR HEAD CAN HURT YOU. This and more allegedly appeared in the New York Times in November of 1998. Supposedly, this article was written by a reporter who took an obvious comedic internet parody as fact. Meyers seizes an opportunity to rally sympathy with this all the while maintaining his "walking contradiction" status by attaching such words as "inaccurate" and "misinformed"; two words that are wholly applicable to both himself, and his own works of martial fiction that have passed for fact for what amounts to over three decades.


This is the sort of thing both he and Weisser would get up to and how convenient that this is discussed within the pages of Asian Cult Cinema, one of the least reputable publications to ever exist. Meyers closes his fluff piece with this statement, "...it clearly shows that when it comes to creating an understanding between China and America, we still have a very long way to go." * Yes, Ric, and your own words seemed to have slipped your mind with your "illiterate Chinese filmmakers" comment, the one about them not having invented the wheel yet regarding the use of dolly tracks and that intellectual doozy quoted at top about Thai cinema (from 2011) being inferior because of a supposed inferior culture. Pot, allow me to introduce you to kettle.


From Ric's racist remarks, to lambasting a fake article, we go to Ric putting down individuals with actual credibility. On his joke of a commentary track for LIFE OF A NINJA (1983), Meyers brazenly reminisces about insulting renowned Ninjitsu master, Stephen K. Hayes. The irredeemable Ric insults Hayes further by denouncing his martial arts abilities despite the man having written numerous books on the subject and his own induction into the Martial Arts Hall of Fame among other accomplishments. The only accomplishment Meyers has amassed is a steadily increasing stream of bullshit and made up nonsense. Again, coming from a regular contributor to the aforementioned fantasy filled rag mag, Asian Cult Cinema and the tabloid trash paper, Weekly World News, it makes perfect sense. Speaking of ninjas, I was informed that his handful of commentaries for Animeigo's SHINOBI NO MONO, SLEEPY EYES OF DEATH and SHOGUN ASSASSIN DVD's are travesties as well. I've not heard them so the Meyerisms contained therein won't make this list, unfortunately.


On more than one occasion, Meyers also perpetuates the myth that the revered director, Chang Cheh was gay. I honestly don't care about the revered and innovative director's sexual preference, but I do not believe his was a homosexual. Anyway, on the DEATH RING (1984) commentary, when he runs out of IMDB credits to babble on about, Meyers discusses Cheh's clumsy, double left footed indy movie, DANCING WARRIOR (1984). He claims that Cheh himself plays a gay manager in the film. First off, this movie is a failed attempt at creating a kung fu version of Sylvester Stallone's STAYING ALIVE (1982). Second, Chang Cheh is nowhere to be found in front of the camera and there is no gay manager character anywhere in the film. The brain continues boggling.

YOU'VE BEEN RIC-ROLLED! 200+ MENDACIOUS MEYERISMS!

NUMBERS 98-121!

98. "...And I keep on trying to tell them, as I tell the Thai filmmakers, which is, you need story! Fighting is not enough. You need story. You need character." *--Yes, please go "educate" the Thai filmmakers and make friends with some crocodiles while you're there.

99. Last time I checked, Casanova Wong was not in TOWER OF DEATH (1981), but he is in GAME OF DEATH (1978).

100. On his Son of Incredibly Strange Film Show segment hosted by Jonathan Ross, Meyers briefly discussed Bruceploitation actors and listed a bunch of them including two that never were such as Tadashi Yamashita, a Japanese actor/martial artist who was in a Karate movie retitled BRONSON LEE, CHAMPION (1974) for its American release and also a mysterious Bruce imitator bearing the name of Bluce Ree. Bluce Ree was seemingly never repeated again. If you're out there, Bluce, what movies were you in?

101. On his Top 100 Kung Fu Movies, he lists numerous swordplay films and modern crime dramas that have no kung fu in them whatsoever. But I guess if a lot of HARD WORK went into making them, than I guess they apply per Ric's daffy-nition.

102. On the same Top 100 Kung Fu Movie list, he even goes to extremes by listing SINGIN IN THE RAIN (1952), THE MAGNIFICENT SEVEN (1960), THE MATRIX (1999) and KUNG FU PANDA (2008), an animated movie; the latter of which, he considers the greatest kung f... what I meant was the greatest 'hard work' movie ever made. And I imagine designing all those animated characters was HARD WORK!

103. Yet again on his Top 100 list, he lists Chu Yuan's THE MAGIC BLADE (1976) as the best of his Wuxia/Swordplay features; yet directly below it, lists KILLER CLANS (1976) as his best; disregarding for a moment that neither film is a kung fu film in the traditional sense.

104. Ric stated FIVE ELEMENT NINJAS (1982) was a hit at the HK box office. While it obviously paved the way for a dozen or so similar movies from Taiwan, it barely made HK2 million. By comparison, Liu Chia Liang's LEGENDARY WEAPONS OF CHINA (1982) made roughly HK10 million and Jackie Chan's DRAGON LORD made HK18 million.

105. Ric has studied martial arts since 1978 and has practiced martial arts since 2002. States that he has a lack of faith in most of the teachers he has met. Well we have a lack of faith in YOU, Ric.

106. "...I got so much more to say..." *

107. Meyers honestly made the remark that he used his book, Great Martial Arts Movies, as a college text book at the University of Bridgeport! How ironic is it that he states he used it for a martial arts study degree program on MYTH AND REALITY!!

108. Brags that HK critic Paul Foronoff, who supposedly hated kung fu movies simply because they existed, wanted to see more of them after reading Ric's info packed book.

109. Blames Bruceploitation flicks as the reason most people hate kung fu movies.

110. States that out of the 360 pages in his new book, the alleged four typos drive him crazy. If that's true, then a padded room awaits after the avalanche of fuck ups everywhere else. Ric also says he's putting together a contest for those who buy his book--Find the four fuck ups and he'll give you a prize. I would be shocked if there were only four. Mind you, Ric doesn't consider a typo a MISTAKE.

111. The following is one critic writing about Meyers commentary track on ONCE UPON A TIME IN CHINA: "Meyers is so ridiculously informed about the history of Hong Kong cinema that he's able to point to minor characters and deliver quick, miniature histories of the actors who played them."--I think that critic meant ridiculously MISinformed especially when Mr. Meyers gets his Yuen's all mixed up on this track.

112. On multiple occasions, Meyers has claimed that in 1975, Gordon Lu-wee was having a movie tailor made especially for him. That film was Robert Clouse's THE ULTIMATE WARRIOR. But Yul Brynner got the part instead of Lu-wee who wasn't even a star in Hong Kong yet. Ric, you're such a kidder.

113. On a related note, Meyers goes further with his wacky power of bizarre ramblings by saying, THE ULTIMATE WARRIOR was a "futuristic battle film that predated the video games such as Mortal Kombat by many, many years." * Huh?? What that movie has to do with the classic fighting game franchise is anyone's guess. Think MAD MAX (1979) or THE ROAD WARRIOR (1981) and you have some idea what THE ULTIMATE WARRIOR (1975) is like.

114. "There weren't scripts for these movies. 99.9% of these movies were not scripted in the classical sense. They were devised." *--Meyers digs himself a grave by stating that the lack of scripts were because Chinese filmmakers couldn't read and write--"They weren't illiterate in terms of their filmmaking capabilities or their kung fu talents, but that doesn't mean they could necessarily read and write Chinese, let alone English." *


115. Meyers has consistently stated for many years that Siskel and Ebert frequently made kung fu movies their 'Stinkers of the Week' on their weekly AT THE MOVIES program. I have never seen an episode of AT THE MOVIES where anything but American product was featured on those segments. "Bullshit, or not?"

116. Meyers has spent his career proclaiming the inferiority of the American martial arts choreographer, but recently, as of February of 2012, Meyers has seemingly (read as temporarily) changed his tune; likely because he was invited to attend an 'Art of Fight Direction' panel in Asheville, NC (ActionFest article, ricmeyers.com; 2012).

117. On another commentary, Ric states that Shaw Brothers never allowed their movies to be released on VHS, despite US companies such as Vista, Southgate and Warner Brothers releasing several of them on American shores. Now, on the KUNG FU EMPEROR commentary, Meyers contradicts his earlier statement to now include the Southgate releases, "When Shaw Brothers were still allowing them to be seen." * He continues only to fumble again, though--"....The Shaw Brothers have not allowed their movies to be legally seen...uh, since 1985, as of this recording. I hope that's going to change, but I doubt it." *--The Southgate and Vista releases were AFTER 1985.

118. In a related story, Ric Meyers says that Southgate Entertainment only put out a couple Shaw Brothers movies on VHS tape. Bobby Samuels sort of goes along with him. One gets the feeling he knows better, but likely doesn't want to stir the ire of the HARDest WORKing Anglo in the HARD WORK movie industry. They released seven or eight of them in widescreen including--KING BOXER (1972), TWO CHAMPIONS OF SHAOLIN (1980), CHINATOWN KID (1977), THE BELLS OF DEATH (1968) and CHALLENGE OF THE MASTERS (1976).

119. David Chiang does not get drawn and quartered in BLOOD BROTHERS (1973), Ric. That would be HEROIC ONES (1970), and the scene is not shot on a sound stage, either. It was shot on location. Again, this is more common kung fu knowledge you'd think an "authority" like yourself would friggin' know after thirty fuckin' years.

120. Chang Cheh's last movie was not ACROSS THE RIVER (1988), Ric. It was NINJA IN ANCIENT CHINA (1993).

121. Chang Cheh also doesn't play a gay manager in DANCING WARRIOR (1985) you ass.


THE SAGA CONTINUES IN PART 5!

The Tao of Ric: True Lies & A Fistful of Meyerisms Part 3

THE TAO OF RIC & A FISTFUL OF MEYERISMS PART 3

TWO FISTS OF RIC AGAINST THE SHAW'S

One of the Meyers-meisters most oft repeated instances of pap peddling is his reasoning for why the Shaw Studios shut down. According to him, Shaw Brothers shut down because his staff were all demanding more money due to their popularity overseas. This fairy tale fluctuates from one ACC article and DVD commentary to the next even including the notion that Shaw threatened to fire any actor on the spot should they take an English name! Allegedly, taking an English first name would make you an enticing proposition to foreign film producers; take into consideration such names as David Chiang, Alexander Fu Sheng, Jimmy Wang Yu, Gordon Liu and even the beyond prolific Art Director Johnson Tsao.


As far as the Chinese versions were concerned, Liu Chia Hui didn't start using his Anglo alias till 1981. The Shaw's were already on shaky ground locally at this point as it were. Likewise, Fu Sheng's 'Alexander' never appeared on the Chinese credits, but it did show up on the international prints as early as 1977. Of particular interest is that around this time, Fu is PROMOTED as Alexander Fu Sheng in the Shaw's own movie magazines! David Chiang was always billed as such. Mind you, the export versions are prepared in Hong Kong so if the use of English names was so problematic, Shaw could have easily nipped it in the bud before these international versions were put together.


In another example that Shaw and his staff were clearly aware of their popularity overseas, here is a quote from... 'Director Liu Chia-liang admits that his aim is to make top kung fu films regardless of the hardships involved, for the purpose of capturing a share of the international film market. He remarks, "We want to show our foreign fans that, although the Chinese people are small in stature, we are good fighters..."'--Southern Screen, July 1977 page 30.


For years now, Meyers has repeatedly painted a not so pretty picture of Shaw as some sort of slave-driving bloodsucker using his actors and crew for his own monetary gain. Meyers later augmented his argument to state that AFTER the christening of Gordon Liu and Alex Fu did Shaw make this alleged threat. Even if that were so, that still leaves a four year window between those two actors christening themselves Alexander and Gordon.

Furthermore, in a 1982 issue of Shaw's own movie magazine, Southern Screen, they discuss how box office receipts for their films--despite the high quality of production--continued to dwindle. They persevered because those pictures were vital to their sustained success in overseas markets. In their dying days, the Shaw's were obviously not blind to HK audiences flocking to the likes of the new Big Gun of HK, Golden Harvest and other soon to be blossoming studios like Golden Princess. Shutting their studio doors (renting the facilities out to domestic and foreign production companies) to focus on television productions was a logical step since so much similar period set dramatic actioners were shown on TV without having to go to the theater and pay for it. It also helped immensely that Shaw owned TVB at the time. The logic that Shaw stopped making movies because his actors and technicians were about to mutiny is not feasible considering many of these same actors and film crew worked on Shaw's TV programs.


Ric Meyers has also made repeated statements that Shaw (specifically Sir Run Run Shaw, the sixth brother, the one who refused to accept his stupid book, mind you) only wanted to make money for himself and never wanted to create movie stars (he says this on the INHERITOR OF KUNG FU commentary, one of the tackiest, and the absolute worst commentary track in DVD history). Of course he wanted to make money. He's a businessman. But to say he didn't want to create movie stars is outrageous. If he didn't create, or promote any popular attractions it kind of contradicts the whole "making money" schematic, doesn't it? Why the hell even have your own publications promoting your product and your talent pool for that matter? How will your movies continue to make money if you don't build up your stable of actors to give the paying audience an incentive to come back and see them again? This is simply one of the most idiotic reasonings I've ever heard.


Continuing his onslaught against the Shaw's, Meyers also contributed and instigated antagonistic remarks regarding the actors and their reportedly very low wages. According to Ric, the actors were "forced" to stay in dormitories, too. Considering many actors and actresses eventually bought their own homes, or bought property overseas, Shaw being this tyrannical ruler of Movie Town seems a bit exaggerated. Furthermore, most Asians send the bulk of their money to their family, anyways. Let me reiterate: I'm not saying Shaw's paid his staff handsomely, nor am I saying he paid them pittances, I am saying that obviously it wasn't quite as bad as Meyers makes it out.

While Asian performers weren't paid exorbitant sums like those in Hollywood, the rate of pay, and the amount varies from one source to another, and their pay rate did increase over time. Again, Shaw treated his empire like a gigantic factory. And really, Movie Town was like its own self contained world by which many probably didn't need, or want to venture beyond its walls. At least this much seems to be true--the performers were paid a monthly salary plus a set amount per film. Bonuses were given to those whose films did well. Also, numerous actors were allowed to freelance over time. This is discussed further in another chapter regarding Ti Lung. The lives of Shaw's stable of stars is made rather obvious in many of Shaw's own movie promotional materials as well as an interview with Ti Lung on several Shaw Brothers Hong Kong DVDs in recent years. Bruce Lee, having become accustomed to the Hollywood lifestyle, famously rejected Shaw's initial standard contract when he returned to Hong Kong to make movies there in the early 70s. Reportedly, he was to have come to terms with Shaw's sometime in 1973, but he died before he could work there. It's entirely logical that the competition, both big and small, would have to offer more lucrative options if they were to compete and Golden Harvest (run by former Shaw executive, Raymond Chow) did that very well by snatching both Bruce Lee and Michael Hui away from Shaw's.

As already stated, Shaw patterned his empire on the old Hollywood Studio System wherein his acting stable was under contract and weren't allowed to seek work elsewhere without permission lest they be sued. He also owned a large series of ever expanding theater chains where his films and others distributed by them (including all manner of foreign imports) would be shown. While the pay may have been paltry for some, it's obvious many enjoyed a comfortable life, nonetheless. In addition, many actors were allowed to freelance and many enjoyed the fruits of their labor--For example, Ti Lung bought a HK500,000 home and owned his own private gym; Fu Sheng bought a 3.1 million Spanish style villa and likewise fancied fast cars; Liu Chia Liang drove a Benz and a Rolls Royce; Yueh Hua and Tanny owned their own home; Lo Lieh owned property in America, etc. Not too shabby for actors with their arms and legs shackled to the table legs of an Iron Fisted Boss.

YOU'VE BEEN RIC-ROLLED! 200+ SPAZ-TASTIC MEYERISMS!

NUMBERS 66-97!

66. "This is going to be a very difficult film to do audio commentary for...nominally I am here to give you fascinating information on the making of the film and the various actors..." *--Yes, all of your commentaries are difficult, Ric. If only you did one where you actually DID talk about the making of the film, or did more than lazily read off an IMDB listing for the actors and actresses whether they're in the actual films or not.

67. On the Funimation Shaw Brothers DVDs, there's a promo reel that plays prior to the films menu screen. A narrator talks over a series of scenes from the various movies and says "Shaw Brothers...who brought classic kung fu style to modern America!" No mention of Ric Meyers anywhere, sorry.

68. Judging by listening to his numerous commentaries, IMDB is Ric's best, and most trusted friend.

69. Meyers states there were no dolly shots in HK cinema till 1985 because, "They're not that sophisticated...they didn't know what wheels were in HK till, like, 1985." *--Funny that production companies like Shaw Brothers were using dollies well before then such as in 1972s THE 14 AMAZONS and THE FUGITIVE. Look for a behind the scenes image from 14 AMAZONS in the next chapter.

70. On the DRAGON INN commentary, Meyers claims the cannibalism angle is "obviously" inspired by Sweeney Todd. The consumption of human flesh has been a popular concept for centuries in Chinese history and in their written works such as The Water Margin series of novels, which have been around anywhere between the 14th and the 16th centuries. I highly doubt Sweeney Todd, a fictional character from the 19th century, was around then. Cannibalism has also been featured in numerous action movies such as another 'Inn' film, THE BLACK TAVERN (1972) and also in Chu Yuan's THE MAGIC BLADE (1976).

71. In Ric's book, Great Martial Arts Movies, he includes a list of movies he recommends. One of them is the venom flick, MAGNIFICENT RUFFIANS (1979), better known on television as THE DESTROYERS. Ric's brief description, which seems to belong to another movie, is as follows--"Patriots vs. Manchus, second team style. Plot? No. Fights? Yes!" *--First off, this isn't a Ming vs. Qing movie. Second, there is most definitely a plot and a right good one at that. Third, there's no way in hell any fan worth their MSG is gonna get a venom movie confused with any number of the kung fu--Manchu movies.

72. Also in the same book, Meyers lists the riotously entertaining kung fu flick, THE MASTER STRIKES (1980) as "Another kung fu take on RAIN MAN..." * --Okay, this can't be "another kung fu take on RAIN MAN" when RAIN MAN was made eight years LATER. What Ric really means is that RAIN MAN is a serious take on THE MASTER STRIKES...that is, if the plots were even remotely similar. Also, his use of the adjective "another" threatens the notion that there are additional Kung Fu Retard movies that RAIN MAN has somehow taken liberties with.

73. Again I will shamelessly, and sarcastically plug his "groundbreaking" book, Great Martial Arts Movies with this bit regarding the fan favorite, KID WITH THE GOLDEN ARM (1979)--"So how do you defeat a man whose skin can't be pierced? Practice, my friends, practice." *--I doubt very seriously there are too many kung fu movie fans who have not seen KID WITH THE GOLDEN ARM, but after reading that brief description, I wonder if Meyers has. Planet Ric sounds more and more like a nice place to visit, but I'd never wanna live there.

74. Claims on his unused liner notes for LIFE GAMBLE (1979) that Jackie Chan's SNAKE IN THE EAGLE'S SHADOW (1978) and DRUNKEN MASTER (1978) are Golden Harvest movies. As most fans know, both those films are produced through Ng See Yuen's Seasonal Films production company. He fixes this on the notes that made it into the DVD, but.....

75. On the same unused liner notes, Ric maintains Fu Sheng had broken both his legs while working on an unnamed movie. He did, however, break a single leg on September 19th, 1979 on the set of HEROES SHED NO TEARS (1980). This bit remained unchanged.

76. Despite fixing some things from the unused LIFE GAMBLE liner notes, Meyers makes up for it with babbling bullshit like saying both Chang Cheh and Liu Chia Liang discovered Kuo Chui in 1973. On one of his commentaries, Ric claimed that ONLY LIU discovered Kuo in 1976 while working on SHAOLIN AVENGERS even though Liu didn't choreograph SHAOLIN AVENGERS as he was back in HK making his own movies at the time. Ric, you're confusing the reader again.

77. Judging by his unused liner notes for LIFE GAMBLE (1979), Ric can't make up his mind whether FIVE ELEMENT NINJAS is a 1982 film or one from 1984 as he swaps out the years from one paragraph to the next. The USED liner notes still have this problem.

78. In the LIFE GAMBLE liner notes, Meyers states that Chang Cheh left Shaw's several years before they closed down because he became "aware of the oncoming storm". He left because his contract had expired and it wasn't going to be renewed, and it was only a couple years before they closed the studio doors.

79. Again, on the used LIFE GAMBLE liner notes, Meyers claims Wang Yu had a falling out with Chang Cheh while filming RETURN OF THE ONE ARMED SWORDSMAN (1969). It was actually Run Run Shaw, which led to the already temperamental Wang Yu breaking his contract resulting in a lawsuit.

80. Oddly enough, Meyers' liner notes that ended up being used for the LIFE GAMBLE (1979) DVD should have been UNUSED, too. THE ONE ARMED SWORDSMAN (1967) was not inspired by BONNIE & CLYDE (1967), nor REBEL WITHOUT A CAUSE (1955). I don't recall there being any characters running around in either of those movies missing an appendage.

79. Ric Meyers wrote for the beyond extreme and highly fabricated tabloid, Weekly World News; which should speak volumes about his legitimacy as a serious genre expert.

81. Amazingly, Meyers states on the FATAL NEEDLES, FATAL FISTS (1978) commentary that he isn't the 'be all, end all', and that he welcomes corrections if he's made a mistake(!). Claims he will credit you somehow or other, but he's yet to respond to any of my emails.

82. "My pronunciations are famous throughout the continent for being really lousy." *--This is the one time Meyers tells the truth, or knows what he's talking about.

83. Pronounces I Kuang (Ngai Hong) as Na-guy Hong (like that guy's hung).

84. Pronounces Gordon Liu as Gordon Lu-wee (like Louie as in the Fab 50s song, 'Louie, Louie').

85. Pronounces Kuo Chui as Kuo Chew-ee (like the wookie in STAR WARS).

86. Pronounces Tang Chia as Tang Chi-ya (like a Ch-ch-ch-chia Pet).

87. Pronounces Chu Yuan as Chu Yu-wan (like chew you one).

88. Pronounces Gyonshi (HK's version of a vampire or reanimated corpse) as Gi-on-shi (like Guy on she).

89. Pronounces Shuriken (ninja star!) as Shereeka (like Eureka!).

90. "...You want to know about this stuff, you [have to] come to me." *--I'm laughing at you right now. Sold that bridge yet? (craveonline.com interview; Sept. 2011)

91. Meyers loved flaunting a bogus claim that Gordon Liu was originally set to star in Robert Clouse's THE ULTIMATE WARRIOR (1975), but Yul Brynner got the role instead. He even makes a connection to Bruce Lee losing the KUNG FU role to David Carradine. He forgets (or simply doesn't know, or care) that Gordon Liu had only just debuted the year prior in Chang Cheh's SHAOLIN MARTIAL ARTS and didn't get a lead role till 1978.

92. Wrote for Thomas Weisser's Asian Cult Cinema rag mag where he handled such duties as making up fake letters and patting himself on the back in his 'Ric and Infamous' column.

93. "...WARRIOR FROM SHAOLIN, which is done by the fabulous Lu-wee Chee-a brothers..." *--Meyers then proceeds to refer to Gordon Lu-wee under his Canto handle, Lau Gao Fei (you mean Lau Kar Fei, right?).

94. BEACH OF THE WAR GODS (1973) is not a Shaw Brothers movie, Ric.

95. "Now this actor, could be any number of people. As much as I've looked up his face and name, I couldn't narrow it down to any less than about four different actors." *--Meyers apparently not trying hard enough to recognize Liu Chia Yung, alias Jimmy Liu, the younger nephew of Liu Chia Liang and his brother, the elder Liu Chia Yung; the latter of which directed him and Gordon Lu-wee in CARRY ON WISEGUY (1981) aka WARRIOR FROM SHAOLIN.

96. Meyers complains of a bondage and urination scene 12 minutes into the horrific SHAOLIN DRUNKEN MONK (1982); which is odd considering Meyers is a champion of Japanese rape and bondage movies and also that he acted in, and allegedly directed two bondage porn flicks. One of which saw him attacking people with a giant dildo.

97. Ric considers SHAOLIN DRUNKEN MONK the PLAN NINE FROM OUTER CHINA of kung fu movies. Prior to this, he stated that A LIFE OF NINJA was PLAN NINJA FROM OUTER SPACE. And wedged in between there, INHERITOR OF KUNG FU was simply the PLAN 9 FROM OUTER SPACE of martial arts cinema. Apparently Meyers is a big fan of Ed Wood.


THE SAGA CONTINUES IN PART 4!