Parasite (1982) review

PARASITE 1982

Robert Glaudini (Paul Dean), Demi Moore (Patricia Welles), Luca Bercovici (Ricus), James Davidson (Wolf), Vivian Blaine (Elizabeth Daley), Al Fann (Collins), Tom Villard (Zeke), Scott Thomson (Chris), Cherie Currie (Dana), Cheryl Smith (Captive Girl)

Directed by Charles Band

The Short Version: This unfortunately reviled and underrated SciFi-horror flick has everything a B movie trash fan could ask for. In this post-apocalyptic downer, the year is 1992(!), the government is one big corporation, gas is $40 a gallon, and synthetic parasites do messy things to the human body. Robert Glaudini is an unlikely hero battling brutal gangs, a ruthless govt. agent, and a monster inside his belly eating him alive! Can he save a young Demi Moore from a fate worse than STRIPTEASE (1996)? Find out in this non-classy Drive-in non-classic. One of the better movies to bear the Band name.

In 1992 an atomic war has left civilization a wasteland. The government merges with a corporation called Xyrex. Referred to as The Merchants, the members of Xyrex brand the populace, putting them in work camps called 'The Suburbs'. Those on the outside not working as slave labor struggle to survive. Paul Dean is a scientist working on a lethal parasitic bacteria for the company. After learning of The Merchants plans for his experiments, Paul tries to destroy them all, but one of the creatures manages to burrow into his stomach. Taking one other specimen with him for study during his escape, he is pursued by a Merchant named Wolf to bring back the remaining parasite. If allowed to reproduce, the creature will send millions of spores into the air, and wherever one of them lands, a parasitic nightmare will grow.

In Charles Band's futuristic world of 1992 paper money is useless, coffee is scarce, and canned goods are as close to gourmet as you get. Beginning as a fast and cheap quickie style remake of THE TINGLER (1959), the script grew in scope as did a few holes in the plot. It's surprisingly well made despite some glaring inconsistencies that, along with a few other negatives, relegate PARASITE to the realm of B movie land; and it sits comfortably there despite a curiously low reputation among fans. Compared with any number of Band's Empire movies, PARASITE is high art. Fittingly, Band's tale of parasitic terror isn't an Empire film, nor does it resemble one, but foreshadows the type of movies that company would produce just a year later.

While we're on the subject, Band's bland roster of movies made for Empire Pictures yielded few genuinely good films. The best of the bunch are limited to RE-ANIMATOR (1985), FROM BEYOND (1986), DOLLS (1987), and ROBOT JOX (1989)--all of which are directed by Stuart Gordon. Of the rest, GHOST WARRIOR (1986), RAWHEAD REX (1987), and stretching things, GHOULIES (1985) are entertaining. When EP went out of business, Band brought Full Moon Productions into the world, and those were even less interesting, consisting mostly of disposable films about puppets and small-sized people, or small sized-people battling puppets. As there was a market for this sort of thing, the question of "why?" remains unanswered to this day.

The son of filmmaker Albert Band (I BURY THE LIVING, THE TRAMPLERS, HERCULES & THE PRINCESS OF TROY), Charles Band had few films as director to his credit in 1982. Among those he'd directed include the killer car movie CRASH! in 1977, and THE ALCHEMIST (1983) was in post as PARASITE was gestating. The project got more ambitious when Irwin Yablans (HALLOWEEN, TOURIST TRAP) came aboard as a co-producer. Budget-wise this was a good sign even if the film still looks cheap--New World Pictures-Roger Corman cheap; even replicating the use of McDonald's boxes to make a set look futuristic. Considering his later directorial work, PARASITE looks like it was made by a different Charles Band. Possibly in these later works, he had gotten too comfortable, the nervousness and ambition of these early features having become nullified.

After the atrocious Italian import COMIN' AT YA! (1981) reignited interest in 3D that had been dormant since the 1950s, a slew of them came in 1982 and 1983. The Earl Owensby 3D horror ROTTWEILER (aka DOGS OF HELL [1982]) came out first, but PARASITE distinguished itself by being the "First Futuristic Monster Movie in 3D!". There was some hesitance in shooting PARASITE as a 3D feature. According to articles of the day, the StereoVision 3D process was very problematic for this low budget movie. The short six week shooting schedule likely didn't make it any easier.

The late Swedish DP Mac Ahlberg's cinematography is one of the films finer qualities. Some of the tracking shots make the film look more polished than it is. The opening nightmare sequence sets the proper mood recreated off and on throughout the picture. Ahlberg's brooding camera style can be seen in the 1981 haunted house/slasher fave HELL NIGHT. Working for Band for the first time, shooting in 3D presented difficulties with lighting and sound recording; the latter of which resulted in a lot of looping in post. Ahlberg seemingly enjoyed the challenge as he returned to photograph Band's next directorial effort, the 3D movie METALSTORM: THE DESTRUCTION OF JARED SYN (1983). He performed photographic duties on many of the Empire Pictures, including those helmed by Stuart Gordon.

As for the title star, Stan Winston reportedly spent two months designing the thing, while Jim Kagel sculpted it. Lance Anderson worked on the creatures, too. All three men went on to bigger and better things. The larger parasite took 3 to 4 operators to perform its various movements. It doesn't look particularly spectacular on screen, although a few shots do look great; some of these are when the toothy organism is partially cloaked in shadow, or obscured by an object. Essentially an elaborate puppet, it looks like it in shots where it's coming at you or exploding through chests and faces. Probably the creatures shining moment of realism is when it's discovered inside Cherie Currie's sleeping bag! This is one of the movies best moments of tension in the film, heightened by Richard Band's fantastic, if slightly derivative score.

Having never seen the movie in 3D, the numerous instances of things flying into your face are inescapable in 2 dimensions, and make one curious to partake in the experience. Some of these effects seem to veer off to the side of the screen, but others look like they might of been pretty great for shock value. The first ten minutes packs a lot of opportunities for all manner of objects, people and parasites to land in the viewers lap. One of the best is an extended sequence wherein Paul rescues a half-naked Cheryl Smith (one of two Runaways alumni in the film) from two psychos; or, as they're referred to in the film, Sickies. After a decent fight, Paul frees the woman only for her to reward his kindness by attacking him. This leads to another fight ending in Paul's psychotic attacker being bitten by a rattler, and topped off with a pipe impalement; the camera zooms in just as blood begins to run out of the end.

Another highlight is the adult parasite, now on the loose, dropping from the ceiling onto Vivian Blaine. In the next scene, her near mummified body begins convulsing. The camera gets in close, the music dies down, and the monster bursts through her face in an eruption of raw hamburger. There's another body-busting special effect during the opening nightmare sequence. The parasite explodes from Paul's stomach while tied down to a gurney. Actually, if you slow down the film, you'll see the monster come through his stomach, then suddenly it's coming through his head instead!

Speaking of gaping holes, PARASITE has one residing in its plot. The film is very successful at delivering the recommended serving of exploitation via its quotient of laser gun action, brawls, nudity, gore, and monsters, so it's not entirely noticeable at first. This particular road block is something of a scripting blunder concerning the monster and Paul Dean's intent to both study and kill it. Why does Paul need to find a cure for the parasite when he already knows he can kill them with high frequency sound? We seem him do this during the opening dream/flashback sequence; which he refers to during a conversation with Patricia in the last half. He then walks off into the woods, seemingly to ponder what to do, only to return a short time later acting like he's just now stumbled upon the idea of using sound to kill the one inside his stomach. Killing it with fire works really well, too. If all else fails, couldn't he just step on it and squash it? When he does destroy the one feeding off his innards, the monster erupts from his gut, yet Paul simply buttons up his shirt and runs around like the hole in his stomach is a minor flesh wound.

The acting in PARASITE is often cited as bad, and while occasionally wobbly, for the most part, the performers do their jobs well. Demi Moore, making her screen debut here, comes off among the least impressive, ironically enough. Considering how her star rose a few years later, there's little of sign of it here. As Patricia, Moore is feisty in the role. She's not a weak woman at all; aside from her altercation with Wolf, her scenes are limited to a line here and there and the occasional scream once the monster is on the prowl. Her presence is welcome, particularly in light of her later career.

Robert Glaudini comes off as an unlikely action hero during the first half of the film. Afterwards, his character drifts away from that, taking on a meek persona. He does fine as the troubled scientist with potentially deadly stomach problems. At least he looks like he's believably in pain throughout.

Luca Bercovici delivers what is arguably the best performance in the whole picture. Playing Ricus, the deplorable, yet ultimately honorable leader of the Ray Guns gang. He's a credible scumbag till bits of dialog paint an intriguing picture of his character, and how he got to where he is. His demeanor changes, if too late, once the ever growing parasite gets literally attached to his girlfriend played by former Runaways band member, Cherie Currie. 

If you're a fan of 80s TV shows, you'll recognize Tom Villard from any number of programs and movies. Probably his biggest success came with two seasons of WE GOT IT MADE (1983-1984/ 1987-1988). Villard plays Ray Guns gang member Zeke. He gets one of the best scenes, too, and one involving the monster. One of the films few jump scares, Zeke finds the parasite springing from its encasement, burrowing into his shoulder; only to make a hasty exit through his chest during the night. Villard was often cast playing goofy, or nerdy type characters, and he maintains that persona as the ill-fated Zeke.

Arguably the best performance comes from Al Fann, who plays Collins, the owner of the bar in Joshua. He delivers all his lines in a genuine manner. You can believe he's Collins. A character actor with over a hundred credits to his name, he's the most likable character in the film.

The one name in the cast is Vivian Blaine as the proprietor of the ramshackle "hotel" in the mostly deserted town of Joshua. Nosy and obsessed with her looks, she's awarded a facelift of sorts in the films most memorable money shot (mentioned above). Curiously, she's credited as playing Elizabeth Daley; yet near the beginning she tells Paul to call her Maggie.

Doubtful it's intentional, there's some themes that reflect current political climes in this country; one of the most glaringly obvious being the depiction of an overblown government becoming one with a corporate giant; linking it to the ensuing apocalypse. The world of PARASITE does well to show that government is good at screwing things up when they have their hands all over peoples lives. It's never expanded upon (this is a 'B' monster movie, after all), but hints are dropped here and there regarding the enslavement of the citizenry owing their existence to the government. This is echoed in Wolf's statement to Patricia, "You're very unpatriotic. Your government does everything it can to protect you and you are a damn ingrate!" To Wolf, patriotism is complete submission to government--a slave to it. Where would you be without Big Brother? His reference to Patricia as an ingrate references his disgust of those who choose to live outside of the Merchant's reach--those who choose individuality to the collective.

Ricus (Luca Bercovici) adds to this upon mentioning his time working for the "big business boys", displaying his brand (like you'd brand cattle) when he was forced into labor in what is referred to as "The Suburbs"; and not the suburbs of the classical sense. The hint of urbanization is prevalent in the script, and only as an insinuation via its references to the city and those who live outside of it. 

 

A sequel to PARASITE was announced in 1983, the same year Empire Pictures was founded. Despite the box office success of PARASITE, the body-devouring creatures failed to materialize a second time. A Variety advertisement listed star Robert Glaudini returning, as were the three scriptwriters, 3D specialist Chris Condon, and DP from the original movie. The plot would have apparently taken the action to the Xyrex corporation for "27 floors of living, creeping, shocking 3D".

After the release of PARASITE, Band and Winston were reported to work together on another film titled 'Crimson', but this production never materialized.

Severely dated with its post-holocaust 1992 time-frame, PARASITE is a much derided SciFi/horror movie within cult film circles. Compared with many other movies bearing Charles Band's name somewhere in the credits it's far more entertaining, if gratuitously so. Terribly underrated in this reviewers opinion, the curiosity surrounding the first futuristic monster movie in 3D undeniably has more to do with its casting and Stan Winston's association than any of the sleazy groceries it delivers.

This review is representative of the Anchor Bay DVD. Specs and extras: 2.00:1 anamorphic widescreen; theatrical trailer.

Reel Bad Cinema: Laserblast (1978) review

LASERBLAST 1978

Kim Milford (Billy Duncan), Cheryl Smith (Kathy Farley), Gianni Russo (Tony Craig), Ron Masak (Sheriff), Eddie Deezen (Froggy), Mike Bobenko (Chuck), Keenan Wynn (Colonel Farley), Roddy McDowall (Dr. Mellon), Steve Neill (first humanoid alien)

Directed by Michael Rae

The Short Version: Don't make Billy angry. You won't like him when he's angry. And you might not like this Charles Band produced nonsense about a boy, a laser gun, and lizards from outer space. Billy turns into a green monster as a result of some unexplained alien possession via a fashionable interplanetary pendant and an accompanying arm attachment which Billy uses to blows things up in slow motion. The script was apparently among the items LASERBLASTed, as it often feels patched together. See Roddy McDowall and Keenan Wynn for about five minutes; and Eddie Deezen in his most villainous role! A BLAST for bad movie buffs.

Two benevolent looking lizard men from another galaxy land on Earth while chasing an alien fugitive. After a brief exchange of laser fire, they disintegrate their target, leaving only the humanoid creatures laser gun and pendant. Scared off by a passing airplane, the aliens leave. Later on, Billy, a bullied teenager finds both the alien weapon and necklace out in the desert. Upon placing the pendant around his neck, Billy begins to mutate, turning into a green monster, using the laser gun to exact revenge on those who've wronged him and those who get in his way.

After the release of STAR WARS (1977), a number of FX artists (some of which worked on the George Lucas's SciFi milestone) had assorted low budget projects of their own ready to go before the cameras. Many of these went unmade or unfinished, while others got financing. LASERBLAST is one such film; and one that was supposed to lead to the realization of what was then a near ten year limbo of an ambitious project from this films director of special effects, Dave Allen. 

One of those Late Night Movie mainstays from the late 70s and early 80s, LASERBLAST is often considered one of the worst movies ever made. It's not quite in that category (in this reviewers opinion), but it's not for a lack of trying, either. Michael Rae's first, and only directorial credit lies somewhere between the realm occupied by lovable C-grade hack Ed Wood and the insomnia curing crapola of Larry Buchanan. 

The story is an interesting SciFi version of WILLARD (1971) with its slighted outcast getting revenge against those who have wronged him. In this case, the rats are swapped out with a high-powered piece of alien hardware. A form of intergalactic bodily possession takes place, randomly turning our hero(?) into a green monster resulting in lots of explosions represented in the films title. But while the story holds a great deal of B movie potential, the execution is static, the performances are unengaging, the pace leaden, and the script is messier than a Sloppy Joe. The editing is key to the movies lethargy. Scenes go on much too long with nothing happening. Why do we need to see over a minutes worth of people in a pool splashing water?

Likewise, many things go unexplained in Frannie Schacht and Frank Ray Perelli's script. What is the metallic object growing in Billy's chest? Where are all the people in the small town while it's being blown to bits during the climax? Some things are just sort of laid out for the viewer to figure out. The origin of the gun, the pendant, and the demonic looking alien wielding them is never explained; but it's surmised that the gun only works with the amulet in close proximity of one another. When Billy wears it, the strange jewel lights up apparently acting as some sort of otherworldly Manitou--transforming Billy into a green, sharp-toothed monster. It also hinders his posture; he wanders, sometimes staggers around slumped over like an inebriated gorilla, hoisting his arms into the air when he blasts something and doing this weird dance with his arm laser that resembles what Leatherface did with his chainsaw.

The one appealing attribute that keeps the picture teetering mere inches from falling into the bowels of forgotten celluloid are the films special effects--silly as they are, the gravy and biscuits of LASERBLAST.

Well known animator Dave Allen (David W. Allen) was in charge of the stop-motion sequences, overseeing the design and building of the aliens and other related FX. Reportedly given an eight week time-frame with which to complete them, Allen stated at the time he didn't get to do as much of the animation as he would have liked because of his full-time duties as Stop-Motion Director at CPC Associates, a company that produced television commercials. Despite Dave Allen's sole screen credit, Randy Cook (THE DAY TIME ENDED, CAVEMAN, Q, GHOSTBUSTERS) was the primary animator for LASERBLAST.

We see these creatures five different times--once at the beginning, twice in space, and two more times (briefly) on Earth at the end. They have a turtle-like appearance in the face, and are seemingly on the friendly side of your typical alien invaders; and only interested in recapturing or killing the far more evil-looking fugitive alien they're chasing during the outset. At first, viewers were only going to see the aliens at the beginning and ending, but potential buyers were reportedly impressed with the answer print to the point that more animation was necessary.

Originally, the aliens were going to be brought to life with actors wearing makeup, but executive producer Charles Band changed his mind, deciding to go with stop-motion animation; which, considering how bad everything else turned out, ended up as the best choice. From there, then 10 year old lizard man models intended for the unrealized RAIDERS OF THE STONE RING (a film that later morphed into the still unrealized THE PRIMEVALS) were going to be used for the animation sequences. With the hope of one day bringing his pet project to fruition, Allen thought it best to create all new lifeforms for LASERBLAST. Another STAR WARS FX alumni, Jon Berg, designed and constructed the aliens.

Steve Neill (THE CRATER LAKE MONSTER, END OF THE WORLD, THE DARK) designed the infamous alien laser gun arm attachment; as well as the green creature makeup of the main star. Neill donned his own makeup to play the fugitive creature chased by the reptilian beings seen at the beginning of the movie.

Live-action footage took place over a three week period in California and the Mojave Desert. The lean shooting schedule and miniscule budget may have yielded some decent FX, but everything else suffers, particularly the acting. 

Star Kim Milford made his big screen debut in LASERBLAST. A man of many talents (he starred in stage versions of Jesus Christ, Superstar and The Rocky Horror Picture Show), LASERBLAST isn't a good example of them. Further linking the film to the STAR WARS craze, Milford was working with Mark Hamill on CORVETTE SUMMER (then known as STINGRAY) at the same time. Milford died at only 37 from heart failure not long after having open-heart surgery.

Cheryl Smith (Cheryl Rainbeaux Smith) amassed a sizable resume of exploitation movies during her short film career. The former member of The Runaways had roles in such films as LEMORA (1973), CAGED HEAT (1974), THE POM POM GIRLS (1976), DRUM (1976), and PARASITE (1982). Much like the rest of the cast, she seems totally disinterested in the material she's given. Sadly, things didn't end well for the promising actress. Drugs ruined her career, and Hepatitis took her at the age of 47 in 2002.

Of all the bizarre things in LASERBLAST, easily the champion weird moment is the casting of perennial nerd king Eddie Deezen... as a bully! Yes, America's favorite four-eyed dweeb is Froggy, the toady of Chuck, the muscular thug; both of whom give Billy a bit of a problem. It's surreal to see Deezen oppressing anybody, and even more curious seeing him threaten to throttle Billy after what appears to be an attempted rape of his girlfriend! Thankfully, an imposing tennis racket was lying around to fend them off.

There are a couple of big names in LASERBLAST, and it's perplexing as to why they appeared. Their paycheck must have eaten up a good portion of the budget, but their obvious conviction is welcome to waken the viewer from the molasses level of delivery of most of the cast. Both Keenan Wynn and Roddy McDowall (whose last name is misspelled 'McDowell' in the end credits) appear for approximately 5 minutes each. Their throwaway roles could have been played by anybody, and are on hand for added marquee value. They're a welcome sight, and do fill in some of the wide open spaces of mediocrity the film resides in.

LASERBLAST II was announced in the mid 1980s, but never materialized. The original synopsis had boy scouts finding the alien weapon somewhere in Iowa. Near bankruptcy, Charles Band's Empire Pictures managed to squeeze out a remake of LASERBLAST in 1989 titled DEADLY WEAPON.

One of Charles Band's most memorable movies (I can't believe I just typed that), LASERBLAST is one of those films best appreciated at a certain age; but upon escaping adolescence, you wonder what was so great about it. The storyline itself works best for young kids; the way Billy acts when first finding the laser gun in the desert is akin to a kid obtaining a brand new toy. In a strange way, LASERBLAST succeeds because of its boyhood, maybe even "immature" mentality. Some will remember it best as an episode of Mystery Science Theater 3000; and others will remember it from its Drive-in days, or repeat airings on Shock Theater and the Late Night Movie when STAR WARS was all the rage, opening doors for filmmakers with big ideas, but occasionally small budgets to realize them.

This review is representative of the Full Moon DVD. Extras and specs: Trailers; 1.85:1 non-anamorphic (box says 1.66:1).