THE BODYGUARD 1973 aka BODYGUARD KIBA
Sonny Chiba (Sonny Chiba/Kiba), Eiji Go (Toro), Mari Atsumi, Ryohei Uchida (Takami), Tsunehiko Watase (Yakuza thug with axe), Yayoi Watanabe (Maki)
Directed by Tatsuichi Takamori"Whadaya know, the Karate fighter from TV!"
The Short Version: Yet another Sonny Chiba movie that's based on a popular Japanese comic book and one of the superstars least popular movies. Despite its faults, THE BODYGUARD ([1973] released here in 1976) is one of the most important martial arts film imports and in its original Japanese release, precipitates the violent fury unleashed the following year in the actors seminal THE STREETFIGHTER. While it possesses some choice, if goofy exploitational vibrancy and being thematically important for a few reasons, its languid pace keeps it from attaining semi classic status and makes one pine for the release of the Japanese original.***WARNING! This review contains images of nudity***
All movie stars should hold press conferences announcing they are becoming crime fighters.
Movie star, Sonny Chiba--upon returning to Tokyo after a stay in New York--holds a major press conference announcing his campaign to wage a one man war against drug dealers and the mob in an effort to clean up the streets of Japan. He hires himself out as a personal bodyguard to anyone in need of protection. A mysterious woman, the Japanese mistress for the now dead Italian gangster Salvattore Rocco, has been targeted by the both the Cosa Nostro and the Yakuza. She asks for the bodyguard's aid and through several dangerous altercations, Chiba realizes this woman is hiding pertinent information and may or may not be all that she appears to be.
BODYGUARD KIBA is one of many Sonny Chiba movies that was based on a popular manga or anime, this one adapted from the comic of the same name from creator, Ikki Kajiwara. While this recut American version is dubbed in such a way to disassociate itself with its comic source, it also has a jaw droppingly hilarious opening sequence shot specifically for the US market. This opening is worth checking the film out all on its own, even if the film in its entirety isn't the best picture to feature Chiba, an impressive actor with a magnetic demeanor. Taken into context, both versions (the Japanese original is not available on DVD) are vitally important for different reasons.
The COKE BOTTLE CONNECTION
Martial arts movies will never attain the near god-like status they acquired during the 1970s following the huge box office takings of FIVE FINGERS OF DEATH (1972), a retitling of the Shaw production, KING BOXER. The big screen emergence of Bruce Lee cemented martial dominance throughout the remainder of the decade till big budget fantasy and special effects pushed kung fu (along with the western) out of the picture and onto television. To understand the popularity of a movie like THE BODYGUARD (especially considering its mostly a mediocre affair) is to understand just how much martial arts in general had permeated the American lexicon at that time. Kung Fu and Karate paraphernalia was everywhere. There were magazines about the arts and other periodicals often contained several ads for various styles both "lethal" and dubious. Schools were cropping up left, right and center and guys like Sonny Chiba and the Five Venoms were quickly becoming iconic among the ever growing American Kung Fu cognoscenti.
Notice the picture hanging in the background of Chiba's real life master, Masutatsu Oyama, the possessor of...the God Hand!!!!
The US dubbed version--released in 1976 through the legendary trash peddlers at Aquarius Releasing lorded over by his morbid majesty Terry Levene--is an important footnote in the annals of (imported) American exploitation cinema. Arguably the most famous bit of notoriety among fan circles is the biblical excerpt that scrolls up the screen at the beginning. This passage is also famously heard from Samuel L. Jackson in PULP FICTION (1994). The difference in THE BODYGUARD is that the words have been sacrilegiously and emphatically altered to give the impression of Chiba as god! This then leads us to the bizarre opening where we see karate schools practicing in the woods while the hypnotic utterance of "Viiiiva, Chiiiiba!" mesmerizes the viewer into believing that the Cheebster rules all and knows all. This opening also retains shots of Chiba's master, Masutatsu Oyama and his students practicing in the woods.
From here, we're whisked away to New York City onto the fabled 42nd Street when it represented a true and bonafide concrete jungle complete with every pleasure and pain imaginable. We follow the POV of the camera down the busy streets ogling the various peepshow stalls and porn shops until we come across a Karate Academy to which we follow the camera inside where hilarity awaits. We meet two famous components of American martial arts--Chinese American Goju Ryu Karate founder Bill Louie and Grandmaster Aaron Banks. Both enter into a conversation about who was better, Bruce Lee or Sonny Chiba. This starts off with the great line, "Pretty good...but that's not the way Sonny Chiba did it."
"Can Sonny Chiba do something like that?"--Bill Louie asks after cutting loose with his nunchucks. Apparently he never saw THE EXECUTIONER (1974).
Both show off their skills--Bill doing a Bruce shtick that rivals Evan Kim's spiel from the 'A Fistful Of Yen' segment in THE KENTUCKY FRIED MOVIE (1977); only that one was intentionally funny. Banks does his best impression of the Chiba Nut-Ripper style showcased in THE STREETFIGHTER (1974). Incidentally, some in camera edits in the film are noticeable to give the impression of speed. The funniest moment occurs when Banks attempts to flip an overweight karate student. The annoyance of this sort of camera trick would permeate Chinese kung fu movies on the indy front around this time. After watching Banks's display, Bill states, "Yeah, but Bruce had more speed...and science", and follows that up with "By the way, where is Sonny Chiba?" From there the actual movie begins.
Yayoi Watanabe was no stranger to Nippon exploitation having appeared in CONVENT OF THE HOLY BEAST (1974) and the 70s FEMALE CONVICT SCORPION series.
Religious imagery is rife throughout (it also turned up in Chiba's DRAGON PRINCESS in 1976) and is made all the more bizarre in the US cut especially in light of the biblical passage that begins the film and also the monotonous, monk-like tonality of "Viiiva, Chiiiba!" In the Japanese portion of the movie, Christian symbolism reaches a blasphemous level when Chiba's busty karate trained sister, Maki, is attacked by mob killers. When Chiba finds her, her naked form is transfixed Christ-like in the shadow of a cross with the words 'Cosa Nostra' written in blood on her arm! The mob--as depicted in this wacky movie--aren't your GODFATHER's mafia; they're a mafiosi that you could only get away with in an Asian movie.
In the opening moments, we see Salvatore Rocco and his family massacred outside a church in New York at the hands of the Cosa Nostra--only these machine gun toting assassins are Japanese! How or when the Italian mafia began allowing Japanese members into their circle is anyone's guess. In some alternate universe where a popular movie star can moonlight as a crime fighter I suppose there's room for Japanese mafiosi, too. Incidentally the dub refers to them as the " Seven Killers of the Yellow Mafia". Amazingly, there's also Japanese strippers with Afro's!

"Say your prayers, fat man!"--Sonny Chiba takes on gun wielding mafia terrorists aboard a plane.
After Chiba announces his plan to eradicate the mob and their insidious operations, he's now a prime target. They even hijack a plane to get to him even though they're no more a match for Our Man Chiba at 30,000 feet than they would be chasing him around the streets of Japan. Another great scene has these "seven yellow killers" hiding inside some hotel furniture in the room of the woman Chiba's protecting. How they got in there is anyone's guess, but when Chiba attempts to get inside, the gangsters apparently mistake him for a midget as they shoot feverishly at the door nearest the door knob of all places. Lives and limbs are lost before the dwindling array of "yellow killers" make their escape.

The violence is occasionally strong and bloody and there's a heavy dose of nudity and sex that made this sort of thing a lucrative prospect for the overseas market of the day. No doubt BODYGUARD KIBA (1973) was picked by Levene for its strange plot devices, its high exploitation value and general weirdness. Granted, the word bizarre and Sonny Chiba frequently go hand in hand at least in the man's most famous works stateside. BODYGUARD KIBA is subtly reminiscent of THE STREETFIGHTER (1974) even though the action isn't as prominent nor as splatastic. The camerawork is typical of Japanese sleaze pictures of the time--it's often hand held, but looks to have been the work of a cinematographer suffering from ADD. And DP Yoshio Nakajima's manic approach is also stamped all over some of the actors more distinguished works such as THE KILLING MACHINE (1975) and the Oyama trilogy all directed by frequent JAC collaborator Kazuhiko Yamaguchi. The score by Toshiaki Tsushima resonates an Italian western vibe in many of its cues.

In Japan, THE BODYGUARD was released a year before Chiba's iconic portrayal of Takuma Tsurugi in THE STREETFIGHTER, but his role--playing himself in the US release and Kiba in the Japanese version--shows a penchant for the sort of eye-opening (and eye gouging) brutality that would become a staple of Chiba's most popular character. Chiba administers a compound fracture to a nipponese assassin (before his arm is torn away), breaks bones and gouges out another enemy's eyes. There's also some impressive stunt work including Chiba somersaulting over enemies and one amazing bit where his character leaps over a speeding car sliding across the hood narrowly avoiding becoming one with the pavement.
From left: Yayoi Watanabe, Mari Atsumi, Sonny Chiba
Strangely enough, the films title and its plot are uncannily similar to the Kevin Costner hit, THE BODYGUARD from 1992. Did Costner or someone affiliated with the script see Chiba's vastly sleazier version during its theatrical run? It's possible and made a bit more quizzical considering Costner was at one time rumored to be attached to the aborted remake of Daiei's DAIMAJIN (1966) movie. It should also be noted that various online sources cite Etsuko Shihomi among the cast of Chiba's BODYGUARD. She is nowhere to be found in this picture (at least I never spotted her if she's in there somewhere) and her name isn't mentioned on the nearly barren American credit sequence. Said credits also state "introducing Judy Lee". Whoever Judy Lee is supposed to be in THE BODYGUARD (1973), it isn't popular indy kung fu starlet, Chia Ling aka Ka Ling aka Judy Lee who starred in the popular QUEEN BOXER from 1972. Additionally, Takashi Miike helmed two direct to video BODYGUARD KIBA movies in the 1990s. So even though the film isn't a high point in the long and frenetically paced career of Sonny Chiba, it's at least unique for various reasons.
Sonny Chiba (left) and frequent co-star/support player and perennial slimy villain, Eiji Go at right. There are a lot worse Sonny Chiba movies, but few are as fascinating, or often overlooked as much as THE BODYGUARD is. It's occasionally a banal, badly paced affair and the photography sloppily captures the action much of the time, but the sheer audacity in reveling in the mud of insanity is the one saving grace that makes this goofy endeavor worth watching at least once. Its status within the heritage of imported 70s trash filmmaking will be its most notorious gift to fans of exploitation movies far more than anything else in the film. And that's not counting the loyal disciples that worship at the temple of Tarantino.
This review is representative of the BCI DVD
CREATURE 2011
Mehcad Brooks (Niles), Serinda Swan (Emily), Sid Haig (Chopper), Dillon Casey (Oscar), Aaron Hill (Randy), Lauren Schneider (Karen), Amanda Fuller (Beth), Rebekah Kennedy (Caroline), Daniel Bernhardt (Grimley)
Directed by Fred Andrews
The Short Version: Not to be confused with William Malone's 1985 film of the same name, this bayou set monster flick is of the recent spate of Throwback Horror patterned after slasher flicks, backwoods horror and Swamp/Wilderness Monster movies such as CREATURE FROM BLACK LAKE (1976) and NIGHT OF THE DEMON (1980). The first 30 minutes are impressive, but the film takes a wrong turn somewhere and sense, logic and plausibility never return. On a par with HATCHET (2006) which may be enough for horror fans to make a decision as to whether they want to take the misguided tour on this quickly crippled monster mash.
***WARNING! This review contains nudity***
Six friends bound for New Orleans take a detour deep within the Louisiana bayou where they learn of an ancient legend about a tortured family lineage and its relation to a mysterious Alligator Man called Lockjaw.

Back in 2002, Eli Roth was hailed for his peculiar foray into Throwback Horror with the release of CABIN FEVER, a film that met with modest success and divisive response among fans. Then in 2006, Adam Green's HATCHET was trumpeted as the "return to Oldschool Horror". Again the results split fans and in this viewers opinion, failed Oldschool 101 despite being a decent enough experience although the same thing can't be said of the excruciatingly bad sequel. Now, it's 2011 and Fred Andrews debut feature, CREATURE manages to do something most indy horror wishes they could pull off and that's a wide release. Emerging from a little over 1,500 screens, audience and critical response has been largely negative with the film pretty much being thrown back into the swamp. Highly touted (and sort of misreported) as the worst opening ever for a US picture, it's actually #2 worst opening per theater average with PROUD AMERICAN (2008) taking the #1 spot. It also currently sits at the #5 spot for worst wide release. But if you go by the number of theaters showing it, then it would be #1 in that range of screens it's being shown on.
Star Serinda Swan above and insert
Watching this film a number of others immediately sprang to mind including elements of CREATURE FROM THE BLACK LAGOON (1954), THE ALLIGATOR PEOPLE (1959), NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD (1968), JAWS (1975), MONSTER MAN (2003), HATCHET (2006) and other vintage low budget fare such as BOG (1978/1983), MADMAN (1981) and NIGHT OF THE DEMON (1980). While it's refreshing to see a movie like this entrench itself on the territory dominated by multi-million dollar Hollywood product, it's also funny how quickly websites pounce on a movies dismal showing at the box office when very little advertising and promotion was involved. Granted, the film itself isn't very good. It's saddled with a poster that's video store bound and the picture would seem more at home on cable television than on a big screen. But something like this is about as close as you're going to get to experiencing similar low budget fare from the 1970s and 1980s in a theatrical setting.
Andrews' interpretation of Throwback Horror appears to be influenced by the numerous 'Monster In the Lake/Swamp' movies like LEGEND OF BOGGY CREEK (1972) as well as the 'Deranged Hillbilly' flicks personified by the likes of JUST BEFORE DAWN (1980). The first twenty minutes or so are relatively strong and follow the slasher/monster template perfectly. But once our six frequently obnoxious young folk reach their destination the movie feverishly gets stuck in the mud and never comes out. The plot makes very little sense and certain massive moments of credibility and logic lapses will surely tax the patience of the most forgiving of souls. Case in point--one of the main characters takes a bullet in the leg and moments later he's trying out for the decathlon and jumping down holes showing no signs of pain whatsoever. Also, same character goes mano-a-mano with the monster PREDATOR style and takes a literal pounding that should have turned him into a bloody, muddy pulp.
Certain plot details are also glossed over whether due to post production editing or just the result of the bad script. What is the connection between the bizarre redneck cult and the monster? How does this cult coincide with the tale of the Boteen family? What exactly is the necklace being worn by some of the victims supposed to represent? Apart from a lot of confusing instances, there's some good things on display here even if the bulk of them are all in the first 20 to 30 minutes.

The opening of the film lets you know you're in for an exploitation picture as the camera gets up close and personal on a beautiful girls naked frame just prior to entering the swamp for a swim. The camera ogles her body from various angles about as gratuitously as the 'R' rating will allow. She's quickly dealt with (by either the title monster or a stalking alligator) and upon struggling to exit the mire, we see her legs have been bitten off cue the opening title card. We then meet our six walking, talking cuts of lunch meat who all look like they've just finished modeling somebody's clothing line. They stop over at this out of the way establishment that doubles as a convenience store and roadside attraction. This is also where we see the first appearance of Sid Haig in a scene that recollects a similar sequence from the atrocious HOUSE OF 1,000 CORPSES (2001).

Andrews and crew capture a great feel for the squalor and grim nastiness of the penetratingly popular stereotypes in these movies where deep Southern Fried local yokels are concerned. They're all un-edu-ma-cated, they have bad teeth, bad hygiene, missing parts of their bodies as well as brain cells. During this literal tourist trap sequence, we get a fine clash of two different worlds, which, in compliance with modern horror today, the scriptwriters fail to garner any sympathy for our arrogant main characters. This scene is also where we're introduced to the folk tale of Lockjaw, a beast NOT destined for its own franchise. We not only get one ancient bayou legend for our money, but two ancient bayou legends. One involving the Boteen family partaking in incestuous frivolity to save their dying lineage and another concerning some sort of feared albino alligator god.
From here it's where things go dangerously astray. The film throws a bizarre and befuddling twist into the mix that defies and questions the circle of friends we've been introduced to. Plus, just about everybody succumbs to the slasher/sex syndrome taking their clothes off left and right whether in a tent or out in the middle of the dank woods where all the snakes, assorted creepy crawlies and our resident Alligator Man reside. For added exploitation value there's lesbianism, handjobs and voyeurism and even more incest!
And then there's the monster. Foregoing the use of CGI, CREATURE goes the nearly extinct route of a full on latex suit the likes of which hasn't been seen on the big screen since JEEPERS CREEPERS back in 2003. The suit is a nice design and the commendable cinematography allows us to see just enough of the creature to maintain the illusion of something ominous lurking in the dark. The title beast also veers vicariously into bandwagon country when it chortles and roars like a Velociraptor and the moment it suddenly shows off an ALIENesque second set of jaws!
The acting is also good across the board even if we never connect with any of these people. It's also a nice change of pace for Andrews to embrace Romero's NOTLD plot device of making the black man the main hero instead of the stereotypical 'fraidy cat' that does little but spew a lot of one liners and end up dead halfway through. While the casting of Duane Jones in that film was an ingenious choice that was topical and socially relevant of the time period, in CREATURE it's something you just don't see often in horror movies.
In the end, it's difficult to recommend CREATURE since it derails so quickly. If you're a fan of monster movies particularly those of the old fashioned Drive In variety like the similar CREATURE FROM BLACK LAKE (1976), 80s junk like THE BEING (1983), or the sort of thing that shows up on the SyFy Channel, then you may get a kick out of this flick. It seems good intentions went into this production even if it rarely shows beyond the opening reel. Even so, it's admirable somebody was able to get their independently produced movie into a wide release during the summer season. It's just a shame it isn't a better movie.
***ALL IMAGES: GOOGLE IMAGES***
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